Day Two: Dignity + Value

[5-minute read, 5-minute assessment]

What My Five Year Old Taught Me About Dignity And Value

Being a mom of a Kindergartener isn’t for wimps.

It requires endless patience, discipline, and energy. My daughter, Helen, is a strong-willed little girl and some days being her mom has been one of my toughest jobs. While that job challenges me, it also means she teaches me a few things: Lessons like, we all need time to be carefree, and curiosity is a pathway to learning.

As an adult, we often hear that curiosity can lead us to new interests and ideas. But to a five-year-old, curiosity is not just limited to new intellectual experiences. Five-year-olds are curious about everything and everyone.

Helen built an unlikely friendship with our neighbor, Jane.

Jane is a woman in her 70’s who lives alone. I knew her as a woman who walked her dog every day, did not own a car, and spent hours in her garden but seemed to have trouble keeping up with it. I was interested to know her, but she kind of “kept to herself” so I never really tried.

 Jane and Helen met. The conversation could be summarized like this:

“Hello, my name is Helen. Why does your dog bark like that? You have lots of pretty flowers. Do you like to dance? I like to sing. I am really good. See… Listen to this.”

Right then and there, Helen made a friend. Turns out Jane is a writer. She used to write for places like National Geographic, but her eyesight deteriorated and she has trouble writing. She does like to dance. She was bitten by a stray dog and so she can’t dance like she used to - but she danced with Helen. It exceeded Helen’s standards for good dancing!

One summer afternoon, Helen was singing for Jane and they learned that they both like to play the piano. I told Jane we had a piano and maybe she could try it out. I was honestly really nervous to invite her inside our home. But once I said something, Helen made sure that it was going to happen!

Jane put on her mask and came in. I was showing Jane around the house, but Helen wanted to get to the piano. Jane sat down and started playing. Honestly, a tear came to my eye. It was beautiful. Jane could really play! She played for a bit and then Helen joined in.

Jane played and Helen banged on the keys. They sang the same songs - most of them completely made up. There was a feeling in the room. That feeling was genuine joy. The kind that music brings. The kind that comes from a connection and a special moment.

Joy, curiosity, charging into the unknown – these are not things that we often bring into work. We even think of them as childish.

Helen reminds me that broken crayons still color and broken people have purpose. She does not do it by telling me the importance of finding use in something that seems broken. She just picks up a crayon and begins coloring – broken or not. This little five-year-old girl reminds me that there is value in every single piece and every single person. 

Dignity and value are not just words to understand. They are actions that possess potential in every moment we interact with people. Not meant for “just the right moment,” but “just the next moment” we share with someone.  

Is dignity at the center of our work with families in poverty? Does our behavior demonstrate that every person has value and unique gifts? How can we embrace our differences and be open to moments where we feel uncomfortable? Those moments that start with dignity and can lead to connection.

By Heather Cunningham, Think Tank National Training Director

What You Can Do Next

Download and complete this brief PDF self-assessment to reflect on how both your organization’s and your personal practices promote the dignity and value of those you serve.